“Its tough being a guy sometimes. Your (women) goal is simply to be loved. We (men) have to make sure we are providers at a certain level, carry the family responsibility, keep the environment stable, etc”
This was the topic of a conversation I had earlier this week! You can imagine what my response was.
Call me feminist, modern chick or crazy idea a “woman” but I took this as an insult. And then I woke up and thought I cannot expect people to think or understand my ideals, beliefs or what some will call “issues.” But because this came from some one who probably knows more about me than anyone else it took me by surprise.
I won’t argue men have it easier than women because fortunately I’ve never been a man (thank God) so I don’t really know. I can only speak from the woman’s perspective because ever since I can remember I am and will always be a woman. Our “goal” is not so simple and is not “just to be loved.”
Why is it an insult? Well, let ask some questions…
Are men the only providers?
Are men the only ones who carry the responsibility of a family?
What about pregnancy? Who carries a child for 9 months?
And childbirth? Breast-feeding?
What about the woman who works a full time job, picks up the kids from school, takes them to soccer practice, gets home to cook a warm meal, while she does laundry, helps the kids with homework and knows exactly what to say when her teenager experiences a first heart break?
And what about the woman who cares for her 3 children while her husband serves his country abroad?
What about the woman who just separated from her abusive husband who has been beating and raping her for the last 5 years?
What about the woman who left her 2 kids behind to follow the American dream?
What about the grandmother who gave up her life to take care of her daughters children while she immigrate to the United States?
What about the young girl who is left pregnant at 15 years old by a high school boyfriend and who pays her way to school and is now a medical assistant for a doctor?
What about the young woman whose daughter is born with a genetic syndrome and cares for her every night only to see let her go after 3 short months of life?
What about the young girl who was kidnapped with her child by her ex-boyfriend at gunpoint, beaten, raped and impregnated?
What about the grandmother who is now caring for her daughter’s boys after she was brutally murdered?
What about the woman who survived 70% of her body being burned by an ex?
What about the woman who had 3 miscarriages before having a successful pregnancy?
what about the woman who is forced to work at a Cantina as a prostitute to pay her debt to the coyote?
What about the professional mom who works 12 hours every day and cares for her 2 boys while her husband works away most of the time?
What about the woman who was let go from her job of 30 years because she was too old?
What about the young professional woman who will never be promoted to an executive position because she is a woman?
What about the divorced mother of two boys who has been able to work her way up to chef, owns her own home and is completely independent?
what about the woman who recently moved to this country and is sexually assaulted by her boss who threatens to deport her?
what about the woman who was raped by the cop?
And on and on…
Do you think all they needed was to be loved? Or so simple as to just be loved?
Yes, all these women are real and I know for a fact it has never been so simple for them. I believe every single person has his or her own struggle and will always respect that.
A woman’s struggle should never be minimized. And this is why this was an insult.