Tag Archives: friends

Birthdays

1 Jan

It was maybe about 5 years ago birthdays began to feel a bit awkward for me. The idea of celebrating “me” feels a bit uncomfortable. I used to get really excited about celebrating and turning one year older. I’m not sure when or why that changed for me. Maybe the idea of getting older doesn’t seem so cool anymore. I’m not sure because I don’t mind saying how old I am and I don’t mind getting older either. I think the fact my birthday falls on New Year’s Day doesn’t help either. It sounds cool but it really isn’t. The celebration of the New Year always wins over the birthday. The only thing I do enjoy about is that it becomes a great excuse to get good friends together in one room- that I do love!

Last year was one for the books, I became a mother and life changed. My world changed. Sometimes I feel I’ve lost a little bit of me in the process and it scares me. Now, my life revolves around a very active 11 month old and making sure he is okay. Most days I’m okay with it but there are days I do miss some of the old me. I miss my voice and sense of adventure. I miss being able to sit quietly at my favorite coffee shop to process feelings and issues through my writing. I love each moment I spend with my son but I do miss some of my old moments and there’s no shame in that. 
I haven’t made a list of unrealistic resolutions that will stay written in a piece of paper but there are 2 things I would like to commit to for the next 364 days:

1. Finding myself
I want to find the sense of self I lost while becoming a mother. I would like to focus not just on my life as mother but also as a woman. I would like to regain some of my independence and voice.
2. A happy baby
I know I’m not the best mother of the world but I do know I make my baby happy. I know this because the way he smiles, the way he looks at me and the way he cuddles with me in the mornings. I want to continue doing this and find new ways to make him happy.

That’s it. These are my two big ideas for this year. I hope you have a fantastic year and may 2014 bring you beauty, joy and smiles. Cheers!

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#naphopomo 2013, Day 17: Dinner en nuestro hogar

21 Nov

imageTonight Gael and I hosted a dinner for a small group of friends at home. This was a first for me. I’ve never really had more than one friend come over for dinner. It was really nice. It’s was our usual sunday breakfast bunch- Rafa, Pau and Ale. I managed to cook a pretty decent meal without burning the place down.  No body got sick as of yet so I think that’s a good sign.

I never really had friends come over prior to Gael because I was hardly ever there. I was always on the go and my apartment didn’t look anything like it does today. One of the things I did while pregnant was transform my apartment into a home. I knew I would have to spend more time at home once Gael arrived so my goal was to make it as cozy as possible. I’ve always wanted a place that felt like home- a place that is welcoming and comfortable.  My apartment is not just an apartment anymore, it has become a home thanks to my little guy.This is probably why I feel more comfortable inviting friends. So much has changed with Gael arrival and I’m really thankful for it.  It never ceases to amaze me how this kid has managed to transform so much about my life in such a wonderful way. He has brought me back to the basics and makes me cherish what’s really important in life.

Our friends felt at home tonight and that makes me happy. For the the first time in my life I can say I have a place I can call home– nuestro hogar (our home). 

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This photograph was taken as part of #NaPhoPoMo (National Photo Posting Month) – a shot a day for the month of November.

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